As Fast As You Actually Can

Goldilocks saw three scooters leaning against the wall. She tried the first scooter. It went too fast. She tried the second scooter. It went too slowly. She tried the third scooter. It went at just the right speed.


The bright young mechanic hooked her GPS (global positioning system) up to a database of state and local speed limits. She fed the output into a new button she installed for her car’s cruise contol. Then, whenever she pushed the button, her cruise control reset itself to the current speed limit.


The city slicker tried to build a campfire in the woods. First, he added wood too fast, smothering the fire. Next, he added wood too slowly, starving the fire. Finally he learned the speed to add wood at which the fire grew nicely.


HitTheSpot is a one-person-at-a-time game of skill. To win, you must move two sloping and pivoting metal rods enough apart at the top end to get a metal ball to start rolling uphill, but not so far apart that the ball drops. As the ball starts rolling, you gently close the rods. If you open and close the rods at just the right times, you can get the ball to move all the way up the slope, and hit the spot.


Foreman: “Boss, how much do you want us to do this afternoon?”
Boss: “How long until quitting time?”
Foreman: “Four hours”
Boss: “I want you to do four hours of work”


Student truck driver: “What gear should I use on this hill?”
Instructor: “The gear between the one that strains the motor and the one that revs the motor”


The boat returned from patrol, slowly chugging up the river at 5 knots so its wake would not wash over the supplies stored along the river's banks.


SoftlySoftlyCatcheeMonkey OnlySayThingsThatCanBeHeard


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