is a program for the single ExtremeProgrammer
. I designed the ThreeDateProgram
for the BusyProfessional?
who is too busy to have inefficient dates. Each of the three dates has a TestCase
that must be passed before the couple can advance to the next subsequent date. At the completion of the Program, the couple will become a PairForLife?
The schedule for the ThreeDateProgram
is as follows:
Date 1 is the GetToKnowEachOtherDate?
: In this date, you want to go to a place where you can talk - dinner, perhaps. After this, go someplace fun like a comedy night. You want your partner to think that you are fun to be with. The TestCase
for this date is that you and your date BrokeThePhysicalContactBarrier?
. This simply means making contact, not kissing. Do not be too aggressive.
I doubt a relationship could develop without kissing on the first date
Date 2 is the InteractiveDate?
: Go out and do an activity like mountain biking around the park, play golf or go hiking. Let your partner know that you have things outside work (however true this may be). The TestCase
for this date is a simple kiss.
Simple kiss? You gotta be kidding. The first kiss must be a terrific kiss for her to remember.
This is stated a little strongly, I believe the first kiss SHOULD be a terrific kiss, but if its not, don't freak out about it! Just follow it up with many more terrific kisses, and you'll be all right!
Date 3 is DinnerAtYourPlace?
: You have a nice dinner and movie ready to go. By this time in your relationship, you should have either failed or you are going to have a long term relationship. Needless to say, wine at dinner helps. The TestCase
for date three is that you have a PairForLife?
More details to come...
Hope you found this funny and or helpful... ;)
This sounds like Big Date Up Front! Actually Date 2 sounds more like a first step, follow that with the traditional Movie Date, then hit Date 1 followed by Date 3.
Have you run the UnitTest
s? What happened?
This actually looks a lot like what I'm told (read: gather from television, which is alleged to reflect society as a result of the desire to get ratings) is the typical pattern for casual adult dating (around here in NorthAmerica
anyway) except that typically the goal there is SexualIntercourse?
. Being JustaProgrammer
I don't really have the means to test that. Anyway, different strokes for different folks I guess.
I am also a co-founder in http://www.esagegroup.com EsageGroup
I wouldn't trust TeleVision
to accurately reflect reality in any significant way... Spoken as a guy marrying a somewhat famous model in a couple weeks, my advice is FuckConvention?
, doing what the TV says is "standard" is essentially admitting to her that you have no creativity. I agree that BigDesignUpFront
can often mess things up, leading to unhealthy obsessions and confusion when things don't go precisely according to plan. My 3 date program is designed to allow maximization of the BeYourself
factor, giving you the freedom to choose dates which reflect your personal interests and tastes, because of course, she must be able to put up with these things if she is actually going to be your mate.
Here's my 3 date program: (When I say "she" I mean the other party of the date, I realize that some female geeks may need dating help here as well!)
1: Massive social Event - rock concert (if you like rock), ElectronicMusicFestival?
(if you like electronica), PARTY (holiday parties are even better - new years eve, your country's independence day, local celebrations), major sporting event (if you like that sport), major conventions (COMDEX, software conventions, "adult" conventions, ComicCON) - Of course to get her to come along, she needs to be open to the idea. Its easy to present however, "hi, I've got an extra ticket to ____, would you like to come with me?" (notice: no mention of the word "date"), and if she says NO, you still have another ticket to bribe other people with! At the very least you'll have a lot of fun!
The purpose of the social event is to have something FUN to do, and, if she is new to whatever scene you introduce her to, she'll find it very interesting, and if she doesn't... you didn't want to date her anyways!
Events like these are loud and busy, minimizing the conversational load placed on you, although maximizing the time you have to observe her tastes and preferences. Ask yourself, what food does she choose, what areas does she linger at (convention booths? music acts?), what does she talk about, what is her energy level?
Events like these are also usually a fair distance away, you would be best to choose one within an hour drive, because the excitement of driving there will inspire lots of conversation, and give you something to talk about, but you definitely do NOT want to have a long uncomfortable silence (although these are usually less severe in cars for some reason), and you do NOT want her to get sore or uncomfortable sitting in the passenger seat)
2: Interactive date - Skiing/snowboarding (if YOU enjoy skiing/snowboarding), day on the beach (if YOU enjoy the beach, also remember - tan fat looks better than white fat, tanning salons are cheap, but if you're white, don't use the full 10 minutes! [although do you really want a shallow mate?]), sunset/evening walk on the beach (if your body isn't bathing suit ready), running a marathon, shopping (chicks LOVE shopping, but if you HATE it, she'll be able to tell) (excursive produces endorphins, which can quite possibly add to the endorphins created by attraction/love)
Note: #1 and #2 can be mixed and matched! If you want, do both in 1 day, do them out of order, do them each 5 times, the most important thing is to always have fun!
2.5: (optional) Let her take you on a date! If the relationship is progressing nicely, ask her what she does for fun. If the relationship is going slowly, repeat 1 and 2 instead, Insist that you'd love to experience it, and ask that she take you.
3: The "Typical day/evening in my life" (although you want to sugar coat your life as much as possible, everything needs to be shiny and sparkley, clean your house but don't obsess) date, this is the one where you wine and dine her, either at a nice restaurant or at home, then you take her back to your place and have something fun to do. Either dancing in your living room, or playing with your kitties, or showing off your artwork or your music collection, if she's a geek show her all your PCs, or taking advantage of your wine collection or smoking marijuana (if you both like that kinda thing). Be sure to engage in playful physical activity, whether it means showing her your wrestling moves, or getting in the jacuzzi with the bubbles on. If she chooses not to spend the night, either drive her home (if you're sober), or call a taxi for her!
General advice: Keep the use of intoxicants to a minimum until at least the 3rd date (and even then don't go overboard), it may seem like a good ice-breaker, but the risk of becoming just a DrinkingBuddy?
is all too strong, and you want to get to know the REAL her, and you want her to get to know the REAL you, not the sloshed versions. Also, most girls are smart enough to distinguish the source of their pleasure, and if they aren't you don't want her claiming Date Rape! Avoid all discussion of past relationships of both parties. Read http://fastseduction.com
(that was my link up there). Never expect sex, but welcome it if it happens! Be prepared! Have a wide variety of condoms on hand, and some lube (oil based lube eats condoms)! Read http://sexuality.org
. Don't get upset about PetPeeves?
, but do note personality incompatibilities.
Remember that a date is just a JobInterview?
, except both of you are potential employers AND employees. No matter how much this feels like your Last Chance Ever to date the opposite (or same) sex, remember, that like job interviews, you don't want to take every job which comes your way, but practice is a GoodThing
! PRACTICE MAKES PERFECT!
Mr. Porter...still working on the three date program...hilarious!!!
Its your old pal Mikey from esage...sorry to interact with you on such a serious page, but i stumbled upon it and couldn't resist.
Did I read you are marrying a model??? Maybe you have something with this methodology ;-)
See also: ExtremeDating